ARE

PUT YOUR HANDS UP lamewoodworker!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

I HAD A BEAUTIFUL CALL WITH MR IRAN: EVERYTHING IS GOOD. THE STRAIGHT IS TO BE OPENED AS WE SPEAK. SLEEPY JOE COULD NEVER DO THIS. ALSO THEY AGREED TO RENAME THE STRAIGHT TO THE STRAIT OF 🥭. ALSO OIL PRICES ARE DOWN 1600%. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!

USO CALLS ARE INSANE LMAO

YOU ARE BIDDING UP SPX WITH OIL AT 89 DOLLARS

yeah my calls and puts are too short (weekly). THEY ARE BOTH DESTROYED

> They’re independent markets. They’re not always correlated. I know it sounds odd but these are very complicated products. BUT THEY ARE CORRELATED

honestly just give it up at 672 mr. spy. WHAT ARE YOU FIGHTING BACK FOR

BRUH WHAT ARE THESE CANDLES

AIRLINES ARE FUKK. IRAN WILL NEVER SURRENDER. CUBA IS NEXT.

WHERE ARE THE CARDS...I NEED THE CARDS

YOU ARE FUCKING RETARDED IF YOU THINK THEY'LL CUT RATES WITH INFLATION THIS HIGH. YOU DO REALIZE OIL AFFECTS INFLATION RIGHT

ARE Y'ALL READY KIDS?

PUT YOUR HANDS UP TomorrowSavings7579!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

MY CALLS ARE FUCKEDD

WSB still BUYING THE DIP THERE ARE MORE TO DIP THAT YOU CAN AFFORD TO BUY

Those ARE the cooked numbers.

# WE ARE THE HOTTEST COUNTRY

LMAO EVERYBODY LAUGH THE ADULTS ARE PANICING

Since mods are still sleeping, MODS ARE GEY

WHERE ARE THE JOBS DONNIE

ZAMN MY NI🅱️🅱️AS IM FILLING MY POOL WITH OIL RN AND WILL SELL FOR 50% PROFIT NEXT WEEK WHEN BOOTS ARE ON THE GROUND 💣🥾🔥🚑🚒

YEEAAHHH BABY FUTES ARE .07% IN THE GREEN LETS GOOOO

PUT YOUR HANDS UP Timely_Chicken_1564!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE?? YOU’RE IN THE JUNGLE, BABY! YOU’RE GONNA DIEEEEEEEEEEEEE

HOW MANY CHAIRS ARE YOU SITTING ON RIGHT NOW

SEE? FUTES ARE GREEN EVERYTHING IS FINE

WHY FUTES ARE SO FLAT SUS CONCERNED

I JUST REALIZED, IF YOU BOUGHT NVDA 6 months ago, YOU ARE STILL at 0% GAINS LOL

ARE YOU NOT AMUSED YET

ITS VERY SIMPLE; LOL FIRST THERE WERE NO BITCOINS THEN SOMEONE TYPED SOMETHING ON A COMPUTER AND NOW THERES BITCOINS BUT THERES TOTALLY ONLY GOING TO BE 21 MILLION EVER BECAUSE THEY ARE SUPER SCARCE EVEN THOUGH THEY WERE CREATED LITERALLY FROM NOTHING LOL AND THIS IS WHAT MAKES THEM VALUABLE BECAUSE THEY ARE SCARCE BECAUSE ONLY 21 MILLION CAN EVER BE MADE EVER BECAUSE THEY ARE THE RULES THAT I JUST MADE UP AND THEY REPRESENT SOME SUPER COMPLEX MATHS EQUATION THAT GOT SOLVED BY YOUR COMPUTER THAT NO ONE UNDERSTANDS AND NO ONE KNOWS WHAT THIS MATHS EQUATION IS OR HOW IT HAS ANY VALUE BUT TRUST ME BRO ITS WORTH $100 THOUSAND EVEN THOUGH FIAT DOLLARS ARE FAKE AND NOT WORTH ANYTHING MY DIGITAL CODE-COINS ARE WORTH $100 THOUSAND OF THEM WHICH MAKES SENSE AND WE CALL IT "MINING" BECAUSE ITS JUST LIKE GOLD AND THATS WHY EVERY BITCOIN IS DEPICTED AS BEING GOLD (WHICH IS JUST A SHINY BOOMER ROCK LOL) ONLY CRYPTOS DONT ACTUALLY EXIST WHICH IS A GOOD THING BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL TIED UP ON THESE EXCHANGES THAT COMPLETELY DOMINATE MY ACCESS TO MY CRYPTO AND I HAVE TO GIVE THEM MY ID AND SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBER TO CASH OUT EVEN THOUGH CRYPTOS ARE TOTALLY ANONYMOUS BUT THEY'RE NOT BITCONNECT SO ITS OK BUT DONT LOOK AT THAT LOOK OVER HERE ANON B-BAM ITS GOING UP!!! WHAT WERE WE TALKING ABOUT OH I CANT REMEMBER NEVERMIND ANYWAY MUNNEEEEEEEE! KA-CHING KA-CHING. WE'RE ALL RICH

GYNA ARE THE GOOD GUYS NOW LMFAO

# ARE YA WINNING, SON?

IF YOUR NOT MAKING MONEY THIS WEEK YOU CLEARLY ARE NOT RETARDED ENOUGH THIS SHIT IS TO EASY

HOW THE F ARE DEFENSE STOCKS DOWN MAKES NO SENSE

WELCOME TO WW3 YOU DEGENS. YOU ARE NOW PART OF HISTORY.

WHO'S THE MARKET'S DADDY? YOU ARE NVDA

IMAGINE THINKING THEY ARE GONNA LET IT GO DOWN RIGGED SHIT

LMFAO BEARS ARE FUCKING SILENT. DUMBASSES

PUT YOUR HANDS UP LavishnessTimely7372!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

“DONT SHOOT!” “ARE YOU FRIENDLY?”

ARE WE MAKING MONEY YET ?

First, your ability to type is retarded. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS WHAT YOU ARE TYPING. Next, you should shut the fuck up. Finally, wait until your dumbshit brain realizes the biggest company on the planet (NVDA) has 2 companies filling their backlog. AVGO has 4 to 6. You clearly need help.​​ do us a favor and never post again.

> A RECORD NUMBER OF AMERICAN WORKERS ARE WITHDRAWING MONEY FROM THEIR 401(K) explains the lack of loss porn here 😤

r u lady OR ARE YOU LADAIIII BOIII

I am soooo fckin tired of this fake PUMP AND DUMP ! BERS AND BULLS BOTH ARE FUK IN THIS MARKET

no matter how cool a CEO might conceivably be, no one wants to see ANY CEO eating their company’s burger. WHO ARE THE AD WIZARDS WHO CAME UP WORY THAT ONe

PUT YOUR HANDS UP Temporary-Alarm-744!!! POLICE ARE ENROUTE! PREPARE TO BE BOOKED FOR PROVIDING ILLEGAL FINANCIAL ADVICE! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/wallstreetbets) if you have any questions or concerns.*

IDK BRO LOTS OF PEOPLE ARE SAYING OTHERWISE

NBIS WE ARE BACK BABY!!

FUCKING BEARS ARE WIPED OUT IS THIS FAKE PUMP TOO? Lmao