IT

I need to make a huge poster board and put it on my refrigerator that says,”THE MARKET WILL GO WHEREVER THE BILLIONAIRES WANT IT TO GO”

BUZZ CUT IT ZADDY AREADY

Any IT guys know how to restart the market? It's stuck going in one direction. When I got it it was going in 2. Is there a warranty on this thing?

PAMP IT BABYY!!

SPY 2% AWAY FROM ATH CAN THEY DO IT THIS WEEK

WHAT THE FUCK IS A NBIS AND WHY DIDNT I HEAR ABOUT IT TILL TODAY

and you people dare to say that I'm more regarded than the market lol LOOK AT IT

QUICK BEARS BUY MORE PUTS AND READ MORE BEAR DOOMER FANFICTION, IT MIGHT GO DOWN

AHAHAH BULLS THOUGHT IT WOULD GO UP

HE CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT!! I scream as I wrap another baconator. "Dude stop crying" my coworker says as he hits his vape.

PUMP IT LOUDER

SOMEONE's put all the pieces together... STUDY IT OUT, SHEEPLE!

Believe IT OR NOT CALLS

> IT SITE ADMINS! The plot thickens

So Alex jones was ranting that all kids of cabinet members are IT allegedly.

I mean his spiritual advisor Paula White-Cain has such christian wisdom as: >BLUR BLUR BLUR BLUR SABBAAAFFFAAAANNAAA BLUR DANILO RAPADIDOO TRENCH LET IT FLOW THROUGH YOU BLURRR SABAAFFFANIII DANILOOO So like, what I'm saying here is dot dot dot.

inb4 🥭 tweet 1 hour before market open along the lines of: “I have decided, after having very productive talks with the Iranians, not to blockade the strait and to continue working on a deal with them which, many are saying, will be the greatest of all time. I AM NOW GRANTING FREE PASSAGE FOR ALL SHIPS THROUGH THE STRAIT. IT IS WIDE OPEN! DJT” Avoids a market crash and actually goes a little green, even though NOTHING has changed. This is the idiocy of the times we live in.

Come to think of it, today could not be a better day for a complete market meltdown. Go on then, fuck it all to smithereens. I WOULD PAY MONEY FOR THE MARKET TO TANK AND DRAG GS EARNINGS DOWN WITH IT. Fuck em...GS = PEDO SUPPORTERS.

🚨 📢👮 DON'T DO IT JOHNY! YOU HAVE A WIFE AND KIDS AT HOME! 🚨

IT....lmao

bers must feel like dragonball z villains when things dont go their way "IT. IS. **OVER!!!**" then the market pumps "N-no...it can't be!"

THEY OFFERED IT TO ME FIRST BUT THEY NO LONGER LET POPES SELL INDULGENCES SO I SAID BYE BYE

SPY 700 THIS WEEK U HEARD IT

LOW IQ POPE EVERYBODY KNOWS IT. WOULDNT EVEN BE THE POPE IF IT WASNT FOR ME. PRAISE ALLAH.

WAR IS GREAT FOR USA, THAT IS WHY WE KEEP DOING IT. PEOPLE DIE BUT CAPITALISTS MAKE BANK $$$ LEARN OR GO BROKE, YOUR CHOICE.

“AFTER MULTIPLE COUNTRIES (SOME OF THE BIGGEST COUNTRIES) HAVE CALLED ME, BEGGING ME TO REOPEN THE STRAIT OF TRUMP. I AS THEIR SAVIOR HAVE DECIDED TO OBLIGE. NICE GUY TRUMP (they call me) AND I REALLY AM A NICE GUY, ONE OF THE NICEST EVER, I BELIEVE. EVEN THE BIG, BOLD CHYNUH, HAS CALLED ME PLEADING THAT THEY NEED OIL SO DESPERATELY. SO I WILL GIVE IT TO THEM. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!” Futures pump 1100 pts

Market last Tuesday: QUICK SEND IT UP 3% THERES NO WAY ANYTHING CAN GO WRONG! Lmao

Let’s fucking bet on this shit. LETS BET ON IT OPEN THE CASINOOO

🥭 tomorrow at 9:29am: JD VANCE COULDNT GET IT DONE BUT I CAN. BIGLY CALL WITH IRAN TODAY. I WILL SHOW LITTLE JD THE ART OF THE DEAL

Tonight: “The STRAIT of HORMUZ (or BOREMUZ, SO BORING) IS A LEFTEST DEMOCRAT HOAX! I NEVER WANTED IT OPEN, IN FACT THIS WHOLE TIME I WAS TELLING IRAN (WHO LOST BTW) TO CLOSE IT BECAUSE I DON’T CARE! IF THEY WANT IT THEY CAN HAVE IT, BECAUSE WE HAVE BETTER STRAITS! THE BEST STRAITS!”

SO THERE IT IS. A DEAL WAS NOT MADE BETWEEN THE WSB MOD TEAM AND I FOR ME TO TAKE OVER SO I AM BLOCKADING THE DAILY THREADS. NO MORE COMMENTS ARE ALLOWED SO DONT FUCK DO IT

IRAN'S PARLIAMENT SPEAKER: THE U.S. HAS UNDERSTOOD IRAN'S LOGIC AND PRINCIPLIES AND IT'S TIME FOR THEM TO DECIDE WHETHER THEY CAN EARN OUR TRUST OR NOT trump will just agree, if this continues for more months and oil goes higher he will get fked in midterms, if he ends it now everyone will forget by then

DAMN IT WHY DIDNT I BUY PUTS

STAYC GIRL IT GOING DOWNNNNNN

look i dont care about the strait but if you dont open it I WILL END YOU. still, i dont care. whatever. but OPEN THE FUCK UP. im gona go read a book. IT BETTER BE OPEN WHEN I GET BACK.

FEAR NOT BEARS. WAR MAY BE OVER BUT THERE IS PLENTY OF JUICE LEFT TO SQUEEZE OUT OF SAAS STOCKS. LET US JOIN HANDS TOGETHER AND STEP ON THESE SOFTWARE STOCKS. REPEAT AFTER ME: SOFTWARE IS JUST TEXT ON A SCREEN, IT IS NOT WORTH TENS OF BILLIONS! SOFTWARE IS FAKE, HARDWARE IS REAL. FAKE THINGS SHOULD BE WORTH $0 SHORT SHORT SHORT

IRANIAN STATE TV SAYS WARNING ISSUED TO U.S. MILITARY SHIP THAT IT WILL BE ATTACKED WITHIN 30 MINUTES IF IT CROSSES STRAIT OF HORMUZ "trade talks going well"

When I was working as a contractor in the IT department they ended the contract because I was doing too much work and making the regular employees look bad. At least I was able to get 18 months out of a 6 month contract.

BREAKING NEWS: PEACE TALK IS DONE AND THE DEAL IS HERE. CHECK IT OUT

Larry Ellison recently figured out how switch his TV from HDMI 1 to 2 without calling IT. That’s when he thought he was ready for AI. He then had to let go of 30,000 mfrs to hide the fact his boomer brain is too calcified for disruption.

#After hours still goin it's not too late to go ALL IN ON $MSTR. Bitcoin is on the verge of a breakout, and you DO NOT WANNA MISS IT OVER THE WEEKEND!

IT WANTS TO DUMP SO BADLY

Say goodbye to IT security.

Bruh you don't need Anthropic's Mythos to find vulnerabilities in software written by Indian IT services companies, a toddler can hack through that shit

OMG JUST DUMP IT

PUTS ARE SO STRESSFUL IDK HOW BERS DO IT

GIB IT TO ME BABY VEDY NICE

SOMETHING IS WRONG I CAN FEEL IT

He sold? PUMP IT !!! 🤣🫵